Senseless violence

All of America mourned and our hearts broke

The day after the Columbine shooting the names and pictures of each victim were displayed on TV and in the next few days, weeks, and months we knew them all intimately- Daniel, Cassie, Steve, Corey, Isaiah, John, Kelly, Matt, Rachel, John, Lauren, Kyle, Daniel R., and Coach Sanders. We felt compassion for them and their families. We knew of the heroism that took place that day, we knew of the tragedy, the way each of them died. We learned intimate details about the problems the two shooters had and how they had ostracized kids at their school because they’d been bullied. They seemed out for revenge and we developed theories about why they did what they did that day. We needed answers, we needed to understand. We spent months and months watching the news stories each day, looking for new clues, new information that might help us put all of the pieces together. We needed something in the evidence to help us understand and cope with this senseless tragedy. All of America mourned and our hearts broke.

As gun violence and mass murders began happening more often, we heard less and less about the victims but more and more about the type of weapons that were used and what type of arsenal they had gathered, and how they had planned the attack. After each incident we heard about the rights of citizens and the causes they were fighting for. It began to overshadow the victims themselves. We didn’t hear their names, we stopped seeing their faces on TV. The stories about the victims were replaced with pictures of assault rifles and speeches from politicians about what the appropriate solution is, what bill needed to be passed and how they needed the support of Congress. These events stopped being about the people, the victims. The rights of people were more important than the lives they were meant to protect.

They have names, faces

I cannot tell you the name of one single child who died at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Yet 18 years later I can still name almost every victim of Columbine. Right before our eyes we have become callous, we have stopped seeing the people behind the violence. We’ve forgotten they have names, faces, families, and that they have stories. The stories are no longer being told.

After the Orlando shooting, almost immediately the rhetoric focused on radical Islam, gun laws, homophobia, hate crimes, mental health issues, and on and on. Immediately after the Aurora movie theater shooting we talked about the mental health of the perpetrator, the fact that he was enrolled in a PhD program at The University of Colorado but later dropped out for no apparent reason. This led to thousands talking about how it could have been prevented, and how a person like this shouldn’t have had access to guns in the first place. We talked about how proper background checks could have prevented him from purchasing a gun so easily if at all. And others talked about how guns don’t kill people, but people kill people. "If he wanted to kill he would have done so anyway", many said. But what we didn’t talk about were the victims. Their names were shared, their ages, and a little bit about them but those stories were greatly overshadowed by the politics.

We’ve missed it completely

The importance of being right about all of the issues has overshadowed every human face behind these tragedies. We are playing right into the hands of evil. This has stopped being about humans. People are spending countless hours debating to try to persuade others to their side, each one believing the other is so incredibly wrong, that they are brainwashed, blind, motivated by politics, indoctrinated by media, or educational institutions, or a generation of ideology. But the truth is, every person arguing is wrong and we’ve all missed it. We’ve missed it completely.

What if we all stopped needing to be right and just focus our attention on the people who are impacted by this. 49 families and their friends are hurting. They are in so much excruciating pain and it will last for the rest of their lives. They will struggle to find answers and there will be none. They will cry out in the middle of night and turn on the TV to try to escape only to find the anger and the debate carried out on almost every channel they turn to. It will be in every newspaper, app, social media outlet, coffee house chatter, work lunch room, school cafeteria, and they won’t be able to escape it. Their lives will be tormenting, and where will we all be when they need us most? We’ll be arguing with one another about the weapon that killed their son, daughter, sister, brother, mother, father, niece, nephew, or grandchild. They will desperately need a shoulder to cry on and not once, but every single day from now until the end of time. They require much and the best thing that we can offer them is ourselves.

People with hearts still exist in this world

Can we put down the I-phone, I-pad, tablet, laptop, and move toward the place where you can truly do something? Can we be a refuge to someone in need? A listening ear. What your political views are don’t matter to them. They don’t need a speech, they don’t need analysis and statistics about other countries. They need another human heart that cares. I pray to God that people with hearts still exist in this world. I pray that hearts are not becoming hardened and calloused each time these events happen and the anger grows louder and louder and all we do is SHOUT. People with soft hearts are needed, by the thousands. Whether we are near or far, whether our contribution is large or small, or whether it helps one or one thousand lives, all of us doing something can and WILL make a difference.

This wonderful country deserves our best. Please look at the faces of the Columbine victims. http://acolumbinesite.com/victim/memoriam.html. These families still grieve, 18 years later. They still need love and so do the families in Aurora, Sandy Hook, San Bernadino, Orlando, Charleston…..

What will their legacy be or will it be forgotten? Will we know more about semi-automatic weapons and terrorism than the lives that are no longer here on this earth because of them? Will we still be arguing our need to be right when the next mass shooting happens? And the one after that? Or worse, will we start using their deaths to justify our position about guns? Too late, that’s already happening. Does anyone feel nauseous yet? Anyone feel sick to their stomachs? There’s a remedy. It’s a call to action. But it has one requirement. You cannot help others while you are arguing and shouting. It’s impossible. So it’s time to choose- argue or help.